To our great regret, there are some individuals who do not appreciate the great contributions King Achashverosh and his Council of Corruption have made to Persian society. If you are aware of any plots by such vile individuals, contact us immediately. (Generous rewards provided!)
Despite the taxes flowing in from the now-empty pockets of his citizens, King Achashverosh can always use more funds to finance his extravagantly necessary activities. This is especially true in light of his recent 180 day party, which made a significant dent in the coffers. Click here to make a donation. (NO tax exemptions provided.)
Supreme Leader of Corruption
The royal king sits at the head of the largest empire in the world, all while spending his days immersed in wild partying and completely ignoring the needs of his constituents.
Minister of Evil
Viewed by himself as the wisest of all men, Haman applies all his wit to concoct conniving schemes that catapult him to greatness at the expense of everyone around him.
Assistants of Evil
Like loyal puppets on strings, Haman’s sons fulfill every whim and desire of their father, hoping to bask in his reflected glory (and afraid of fatal consequences should they disobey.)
Winner of the “Worst Wife of the Year” Award, Zeresh alternates between providing Haman with very risky ideas and hacking away at his ego relentlessly.
The Department of Commerce forbids the import and export of commodities without explicit written permission from a department official. This is vital in ensuring an constant flow of taxes to the city’s coffers, as each item imported or exported is subject to a tax. Anyone caught violating this injunction will have their items permanently confiscated.
ALERT: Group of vicious bandits has been attacking travelers on the roads leaving Kush. Be advised not to undertake any unnecessary travel until the culprits have been apprehended. If travel cannot be delayed, ensure that there are guards and warriors in your traveling group.
Annual repairs are underway in the streets around the royal palace. Only those on official business will be allowed in.
Due to the shortage of reeds in the fields around Shushan, it is forbidden to sell or purchase new reed baskets until the fields have been regenerated! Basket repair workshops will be erected around Shushan to ensure people have enough working baskets for their weekly market trips.
I am proud to call myself a member of the greatest empire in the world, the Persian empire! Of course, I have a very happy life. This testimonial is entirely voluntary.
Bijan, son of Alborz
Since I was a little girl, I always loved the Persian Empire. And since King Achashverosh took over, I understand what a majestic empire it once was. Please do not read too deeply into my statement.
These tears streaming down my face are tears of happiness! I am so grateful that the very last of my crop will be used at the royal party, leaving my family with nothing to eat. We are honored to be so unceremoniously used to provide extravagance for the king.
There is no greater wisdom than that which is rained down upon us daily from the Royal Palace. Each morning, I anticipate the deep, profound things I will be able to pontificate upon all day.
Simin, daughter of Tadaaki